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Assassin’s Creed Valhalla Goes Beyond Merely Petting These Enormous Honkin’ Cats

If there’s one good thing to come from 2020 it’s the increased importance in gaming of being able to pet every goddamn animal that you can. It’s something we all want to do in real life, but since we’re all stuck inside due to COVID lockdowns, we can’t do it nearly as much as we’d like. Games are an escape, but they’re also a reflection of the world in which we truly want to live, and that world includes petting cats, dogs, fluffy bunnies, and other adorable woodlands creatures.

Assassin’s Creed Valhalla is no exception to this rule. Preview copies have started percolating around the upper echelons of the gaming media sphere, and while our very own Kirk Mckeand spent his time in Valhalla stealing eggs from poisonous snakes and getting farted on by a geriatric woman with an ovum obsession, other outlets were making arguably even more important discoveries.

PC Gamer discovered that you can pet the cat in Assassin’s Creed Valhalla. Moreover, the cat is freakin’ humongous.

The cat is, apparently, a resident of the Viking longhouse that you can create in AC Valhalla’s new settlement system. Judging by this absolute unit’s volume, it’s either a lynx or a Norwegian forest cat, a breed of domesticated feline known for its thick, fluffy fur and above-average size. As the name suggests, the breed originates from Norway, which makes sense given the whole Viking thing.

It’s also totally adorbs. It leaps into Eivor’s hands and demands cuddles, which Eivor provides with a face nuzzle that makes us all long for the affection of a cute kitty.

Fart jokes and giant cats aside, AC Valhalla certainly seems like it’s going to be a weird ride. As Kirk said, “Valhalla is tonally all over the place.” One moment you’ll be installing a puppet government, the next you’re foiling a philandering knight and then murdering the knight’s jilted ex-lover.

Which I guess is also sort of representative of how 2020 is going.

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